If people watching were a sport, I think it might be one of my favorites to play.  I get a kick out of watching a person’s mannerisms, their habits and funny quirks to see how they tick.  From their wardrobe choices to snack favorites to the people they are with, there is always something to give a little hint to their story.  While everyone has their own unique story, there are always common patterns that stand out and finger which particular herd they belong to.

Just like there are sporty types and nerdy types and ultra-professional types, there is a ranch wife type.  There is always a little bit of flare or spin each will have, but there are some down-to-the-core identifiers no one can shake off.

She might be a ranch wife if...

... she actually looks forward to the end of daylight savings time.  While the rest of the world is mourning the beginning of short days and long dark nights, ranch wives all around are celebrating the season’s end to the nearly bottomless work days that seem to only stop when the sun has.  Tractor lights and heated shops will occasionally add a few long days here and there for the determined rancher types, but for the most part sundown will close out the work day.  And for ranch wives that means the honey-do list, date night, and an early bedtime can finally have their place in the schedule.

... her husband keeps the mudroom supplied with a large assortment of hats, coats, hoodies, and gloves.  This might sound like the rancher of the household is in charge of the work wear shopping but he is really just the middleman.  The true mudroom suppliers are the myriad of sales reps that pass on their various swag.  Sometimes it’s just a hat in passing but other days it’s a coat or a hoodie after a hefty new tractor purchase.  Either way, the consolation prize is a great addition to the mudroom.  Unless of course it’s a hat that can’t ever find its way into a garbage can, but that’s a different conversation.

... she has had to put some breachy critters in while the rancher is away.  Ranch wives are cursed, there is no other way to explain it.  The minute all the regular, daily help has left the ranch, some sort of escape is bound to happen.  And it usually culminates in some ornery bull or flighty heifer in the garden patch that just doesn’t want to be herded back to the pen.  Leaving them until the rancher returns to put them back in just isn’t an option because leaving them unattended any longer is sure to result in unplanned fall calves, cattle lost in the cedars, or bloated steers on the alfalfa.  

... she has a junk drawer that is more like a rancher’s lost and found.  Every house has a junk drawer for the random things that really don’t have a home in the house.  When a ranch wife looks through hers, it’s not random batteries, chapsticks and rubber bands.  Instead, the junk drawer is full of washers, tags, fencing clips, and the like.  I might not be able to find a tag marker in the shop where it actually belongs, but I know where to find one in the junk drawer of our house where it has ended up.  Truthfully, I’d far prefer those misplaced ranching odd and ends to be in the junk drawer than left in pockets to make their way in the washer or the like.  A cattle paint stick through the wash is something you can never come back from.

... her immediate presence has been demanded to help turn the cows or block the road.  And usually this need is at the most inopportune time- mid shower, when the kids are screaming for a snack or dinner is just about to come out of the oven.  Usually there is only enough time to grab a coat or shoes, but every once in a while a ranch wife will get lucky and have enough time to properly pause whatever it is that she is doing. 

... she gets “the look” when stepping foot on the ranch with “inappropriate” clothes.  That hasty rush out the door may be on the rancher’s behalf, but heading out to help in anything less than jeans, a button up shirt, with boots, and gloves will surely provoke a swift scolding for a ranch wife on work apparel choices.  It doesn’t matter if the plan is to help for a quick second or because she knows that its cushy ride in the hot tractor, leggings, sandals, or short sleeves are always looked down on.  

... she doesn’t wait to be asked to get the gate.  There might have been a day that a new ranch wife waited to be politely asked to assist the rancher by opening the gate.  But those days are long gone.  Any ranch wife knows, without a doubt, that if you are riding shotgun, you are the default gate getter.  It doesn’t matter if there are babies on your lap, work to do along the ride, or the earlier mentioned poor shoe choice on.  I mean, why else would she ride along if she wasn’t going to get the gate?!

 ... her fridge and pantry could double for a vet supply store.  From vaccines to anti-inflammatories, all those medications need a comfortable, temperature controlled space and what better space than a ranch wife’s own kitchen?!  The condiments have a space on the refrigerator door and so do the horse prescriptions.  No one in the household bats an eye to the unusual medley of ranching must haves.  A clear identifier of a ranch wife.

... she has learned that any daily schedule or plan is only loosely followed if it is followed at all.  A trip to check the water will just as suddenly turn into a parts supply run, even if that wasn’t the plan from the beginning.  The sudden breakdown or last minute remembering will abruptly spur a change of plans and the only way to know is when the truck is headed in the wrong direction.  There is no consultation or heads up.  But a seasoned ranch wife knows to always plan far more time than the rancher thinks they will take and to bring along a few snacks and a book to read.

... she doesn’t ever plan to have dinner on time.  Unless “on time” is about nine o’clock at night or simply when the rancher walks in the door.  Long days of impossibly long to-do lists to manage, last minute repairs to fix, or lost cattle to retrieve make it impossible to set a daily dinner time.  It is far easier to get the cattle fed than the family.  Somehow, the ranch feedings are down to a science.  The people feedings- who to feed, what to feed them, when to feed them- are still a guessing game.  

It doesn’t take much looking to see the mental gymnastics ranch wives all do to keep up with the ranch and the rest of life.  In the right crowd, they’re easily picked out because they are the ones balancing the grocery list and the parts list, food for dinner and feed for the barn, and the right shoes to move cows in before heading to the PTO meeting.  Fortunately for their husbands, operations, kids and the rest of the world, they are the best at juggling heavy loads, finding the best in whatever circumstances they find themselves in and willing to give everything and anything their best shot.